Ok so I know there doesn’t appear to be a part 1 or 2 but essentially that was the previous two weeks!
After writing last week’s blog I was trying to decide exactly where to start my self discovery journey, because there are so many things that have happened in my life, where do you actually begin? And then I realised that a significant factor in discovering who I am was my shoes.
WTF, shoes? I hear you ask.
Yes, Shoes.
This is going to sound a bit long-winded but you need to get the background….

Before realizing I was clairvoyant I worked as an Executive Assistant and I do believe that I was always good at my job, efficient, organized, loved to chat… but the last official job that I held I just didn’t gel with the CEO nor the HR Manager.  A few weeks previously, my GG decided he needed someone else in the office to do the pays and I said that I would drop my hours at the company and work for him, so I spoke to the HR Manager and told him that I was happy to go to 3 days per week (it was what he was wanting so he could have a full-time HR Assistant). However I HAD to have Thursday’s off he agreed and all was fine, then a week later he said that the CEO had declared that I had to work Thursday’s so I rescinded my offer to go part-time and was going to stay full-time. I had been in the role for a year by now and after this discussion I was completely blindsided by both of them. I was asked to attend a ‘meeting’ with the CEO by the HR Manager and given 15 minutes warning, I rocked up thinking we were going to discuss me reducing my hours and finding a mutually beneficial outcome when in fact I was hit with the fact that I wasn’t reliable because I had changed my mind about the hours I worked and that I wasn’t a prepared person. The CEO even pointing out that I was unprepared for this meeting and he had notes (WTF I didn’t even KNOW about the meeting until 15 minutes ago and NOT what the meeting was about!). I burst into tears and grabbed my phone and rang GG explaining what had happened, his reply was ‘just quit, I’ll find the hours / money to support you, just come and work for me’. So, I walked into the office packed my stuff and just walked out for the rest of the day. I went back the next morning and handed in my resignation giving them 2 weeks’ notice and within an hour I was given my severance pay and told to pack my stuff and leave. I replied that I would finish up all tasks that were unfinished so that whoever took over wasn’t left bewildered.
I did that and said goodbye to everyone and walked out the door.

I was shattered, I had never been treated like that in a job, EVER. To this day I still think the CEO and the HR Manager are asses and what they did to me was totally against the law but I’m glad I’m not there anymore.
So, what has that got to do with shoes?

After having my low self-esteem shot to nothing, I opened my wardrobe doors and sat cross legged on the floor and counted my shoes. I owned 45 pairs of shoes.
That’s 45. Pairs. Of. Shoes.
I sat there staring at them all thinking to myself, who the FUCK needs 45 PAIRS OF SHOES! (Oh and just for the record I now own 22 pairs including thongs and sneakers!)
But it made me realise that if I didn’t spend money on shit like shoes and clothing I don’t need, how much did I really need to earn? For me it was a huge wake-up call that I kept thinking I needed to earn big dollars when in reality, I could be much happier earning less and just spending less on bloody shoes!

That was the start for me in working out who I am and what I need in life. And while I still love shoes because they are sooooooo pretty, I no longer buy them if I don’t need them.
That’s a lie.
I still buy them but I’m much more selective and try to not buy them just for the sheer sake of it! But if they’re really, really pretty – I may just splurge once a year…. And I still go on eBay and look and watch but I don’t buy…

We all have our weaknesses and mine is shoes. However, I now realise that we were just spending so much money on shit, things we didn’t really need, that we just liked or wanted but essentially didn’t need and that was a huge turning point for me.

So, here is your challenge for the week – I would love you to sit down and work out what you don’t really need that you continue to buy, and if you did without it, how much would you save? Would you have to be working as long and as hard?

I would love to hear your feedback.  How did you find this exercise?  What did you discover?